Though people argue that, like many other things, happiness is relative; I believe that the overreaching feeling of joy and contentment that comes with happiness can be experienced by everyone who pursuits it.
Several disciplines such as philosophy, psychology and even religion have tried to define happiness and identify its sources but have not been able to capture it all. This is simply because; we are distinct individuals who find happiness from variety of sources.
In its simplest form, happiness can be said to be a long term emotional state of well-being characterized by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy.
When it comes to happiness, I believe in the “What One Has Theory” which captures happiness as simply the collected sum of positive circumstances in one’s life.
Positivity therefore becomes a central ingredient in becoming happy.
My ‘pursuit of happiness’ together with life experiences have thought me the following as the most effective ways one can adopt to understand and achieve lasting happiness in life.
1. Being Real With Yourself
Putting yourself under unnecessary pressure to be what you are not in life takes you far away from happiness. Happiness does not dwell in the hearts and minds of chaotic individuals. To be able to experience happiness, you must be at peace with yourself and be able to embrace who you really are as a person.
Living in people’s shadows and pushing yourself beyond limits to cope with the stress of being what you are not disturbs the emotional state needed to experience happiness.
For you to develop the long term emotional state of well being needed to experience happiness, you must accept who you are as a person, live out of pretence and be real with yourself.
2. Live Within Today
Life is beautiful despite the many ups and downs that come with it. To be able to experience happiness in life, you must learn to live today and enjoy today. Many of us have buried our heads in the past and future.
Either our today has been overshadowed by our mistakes and failures of yesterday or the anxiety of tomorrow. The same routine repeats itself when tomorrow comes. We are never living a day without the past and future taking over and consuming our thoughts.
For you to be happy in life, you must live today devoid of all your past mistakes and future anxieties.
Remember, you must have that serenity of mind to be able to endure in the world of happiness.
3. Allocate Little or No Time To Pain
As I mentioned in my post ‘You Are Unhappy In Life Because You Want To Be…‘ a happy person in life is the individual who is able to control how long he allows the misfortunes of life to live with him.
Anytime such a person is hit by the storm of pain and sorrow, he bounces back quickly to look for the little opportunities scattered in close proximity by the storm.
On some level, our happiness and well-being are determined by the time we allocate to pain. Most of us are unhappy in life because we allocate more than enough time to the issues making us sad.
For you to be happy in life, you must be able to shake off sorrowful events and misfortunes and let the next minute give you a new hope and opportunity.
If you are able take control of the time you allocate to depressing events in your life, you will realize that, the little time you give to these events, the happier you will become as a person.
- Think Positive
Happiness springs from positivity. It develops well under positive conditions. If you want to be happy in life, you must begin to give prevalence to positive thinking in your life. Instead of constantly considering what can go wrong, look at the brighter side of things.
Whenever you are knocked by a negative event, quickly think around how you can turn that into a positive influence. If you can’t find any positive influence within your situation, consider the lessons you will learn from such a negative event as a positive vibe.
Begin to condition your mind to love positive thoughts. Wish positive things for others, even those you do not know. Let positivity be all that you know.
When you are able to develop a positive mindset and approach to things, happiness will become part of your journey through life, as you would have given it the needed conditions to roll into your life.
- Do Not Compete With Anyone In Life
Even though competition brings the best out of us, it is absurd to constantly put yourself in a life competition with your friends or people around you. Apart from the fact that this may put you under needless pressure, it can easily land you into the deep pit of depression should your competitors continue to excel beyond your strength? It can also give birth to unnecessary jealousy and unhappiness.
Personally, to be able to tap into the benefits of competition whiles being conscious of the negativity that easily crops out of competition, the only person I compete with in life is myself.
For you to be happy in life, you must stay away from competing with others. You are unique and therefore, you must not line yourself with any body. Unnecessary pressures of competition easily kick happiness far from our lives.
To be happy in life, do not engage in life race. Life is never a competition. Remember that, when you compete with others in life, you miss the very tiny but precious moments of your life which bring happiness as result of the rush or rat race.
If you ever find the need to compete in life, then just compete with yourself by striving to achieve more than your previous achievements. Even in doing this, you must be realistic with your targets.
- Follow Your Dreams/Passion
Most of us think of dreams or passion as those things that will bring financial benefits. We forget that, our true dreams are the activities that uplift our soul and fetch us happiness in life.
There are several things we are passionate about in life. In order to be happy in life, we must find time and pursue our passions or dreams. Even if we will not obtain financial satisfaction, we must not forget the huge emotional satisfaction and joy (happiness) that such activities can bring us.
If you are passionate about pets, get one…If your dream is to learn different languages, chase it up.
A happy person is the individual who is able to live his dreams and passion
- Love Others/Be Happy For Others…
When your friend or family member achieves something great, join in the celebration and be happy for the person. Life should not always be about you. Happiness comes from different sources and being able to be happy for others brings equal feeling as being happy for yourself.
Whenever you hear of something great in another person’s life, put a smile of joy up and tap into the happiness.
Love others as you love yourself. When you love someone, you will not have problems celebrating their achievements and being happy for them.
After all, all you want is to be happy in life right? Do not over emphasis on the source of the happiness. Just enjoy it!
- Have Fun
Life is not as serious as some of us have taken it. Even if it is difficult, can we not find time to have fun?
Happiness flows from different sources and the best part of it is that, all the sources give the needed joy, contentment and emotional satisfaction.
Having fun in life includes creating your happiness. Do you like comedy? Give yourself a time off from the seriousness and pettiness of life to enjoy creativity or comedy and laugh your hearts out.
If you love to read fiction, get several of such materials and make yourself happy by finding time to read them.
When the party is not far from you, put on your shoes and dance off like there is no tomorrow. After all, you do not even know if there will surely be tomorrow.
Life is not that serious as you have made it to be. Create your own happiness by making fun part of your daily existence.
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