So what does it really take to reach success? Success is a very complex phenomenon that cannot be summed up in a few sentences. Depending on who you ask, success means different things. If you were to ask me, I’d say it means having improved lives with many gifts. If you were to ask an entertainer, he or she might say it involves reaching the highest peak of their career. The first step in achieving success is often deciding what it means to you.
But whatever your version of success is, it can be really annoying and frustrating—when day after day, things are not working out for you. There are thousand of books, articles, videos, interviews out there, dedicated to teach you to be successful and yet with all this incredible information available at little to no cost, so many of us continue to live in mediocrity and will never taste success before we hit the grave.
Fortunately there are signals Life gives to let you know you are on the road to constant failure. By acknowledging them and making the necessary changes, you will increase the odds of obtaining success.
Check out these 12 reasons why you will not make the cut to become successful
1. You have dreams (great) but your set goals are not so great
You often imagine a more desirable version of your life, but instead of working towards making that vision a reality, you settle for present circumstances. You complain often, but change little. You say you want certain things but you do nothing to obtain them. You wish for your life to get better but you make no commitment to improve yourself or your circumstances.
Successful people are driven by clear and specific goals. Their goals are what guide their decisions and daily activities, and they rarely let a day pass by without doing something to bring them closer to achieving them. Their dreams aren’t something they sleep with at night; their dreams are something they wake up to.
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2. You hang with losers and people who are going nowhere
Do you surround yourself with like-minded people? People who have your best interests in mind will want to talk to you about your bad habits and may even be able to provide constructive criticism. At work and on your days off, spending time with people who have a positive life outlook can be very inspiring. Jim Rohn, once said that you become the average of the five people you spend the most time with- if you spend time with people who do not support or encourage your success, who have no goals, ambitions and no concrete plan to improve their life, Cut them lose.
Successful people know that the attitudes of the people around them are contagious so they intentionally surround themselves with powerful networks that empower them. They know they can’t afford to adopt the beliefs, thoughts and habits of mediocre people if they are going to continue to succeed.
3. You entertain yourself instead of educating yourself
Instead of spending your spare time investing in yourself to provide more value to your marketplace, you distract yourself with entertainments that add no real value to your life or your productivity. You live for the weekend. Thought of going to networking events in your industry, going to seminars to learn new skills and trends in your industry are foreign to you. It is harsh but “You will never smell success” if you don’t divert your attention.
4. You don’t spend money on things that will propel your dream
You often run out of money as soon as you get it and you do not invest any for the future. Cars, expensive hair weaves and expensive brands—that have nothing but tags placed on them take priority when it comes to your spending. “The rich live below their means, not because they’re so savvy, but because they make so much money that they can afford to live like royalty while still having a king’s ransom socked away for the future.”
Why spend money trying to look successful while your balance sheet tells a different story. You don’t have any assets that make money for you and your spending habits are your biggest liability. You sometimes come close to acknowledging the truth about your situation, but instead of facing it and changing it, you let it continue. Thinking about your finances gives you headache and you prefer to avoid the subject entirely.
Reminder- Spend money, instead, on your own development and business to fuel your growth.
5. Your beliefs have made you blind to reality
“The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease forever to be able to do it”-Peter Pan.
Do you believe you hold the key to your life and will do whatever it takes to achieve your goal? Or you are waiting for the right numbers to hit a jackpot, praying to God for prosperity, government, boss or spouse to save the day?
Remember – the great minds are already solving problems while the mediocre is wishing on a star or luck to get them through. The foundation of success is not a set of achievements or a combination of external factors; it is a mindset.
Success is an attitude that comes from a framework of powerful beliefs and empowering thoughts. Because what you think and believe about your life largely determines how you feel (your attitude), what actions you take (your behavior), and what you achieve (the end result.)
It’s easy to blame someone else for your troubles, but it doesn’t resolve anything. Sure, at first it might seem reasonable to expect your problems to be solved by those who helped create them, but stop and think about it. Do you want to give the people who created past problems for you any additional control over your future?
6. You don’t know who or what you are
Is your self worth low? And are you confused because you have been programmed from childhood with lies, illusions, fears, negative thoughts—and even though you have seen through the pretense and ignorance, you still live to please hypocrites and mediocrity?
Know that it’s impossible to please everyone .Some people (especially mediocre) will always tell you what you did wrong, and then hesitate to compliment you for what you did right. Don’t be afraid you will get laughed at. While it is important to receive validation for your work, constantly seeking that pat on the back from others will get you nowhere. Do not feed into the ego of your ever-needy self-esteem. It is nice to receive good comments on your work. But do not mix up what is good for the ego for what is good for your productivity.
7. You stay in Relationships that aren’t working
Remember the most powerful relationship and best relationships you will ever have is the relationship with you. If you’re not comfortable enough with yourself or with your own truth when entering into a relationship, then you’re not ready for that relationship. If you have the tendency to date people who bring more problems than pleasure and often tolerate behaviors you know are unacceptable, then you have to sit and evaluate your life. Whatever the case is, you must understand that your choice of spouse has a major impact on your life and success
8. You have stopped learning
Even Michael Jordan had a coach and a host of other talented guys who have the spotlight have mentors and coaches. If you think what you are doing now is the best and all that can be-so is it. Pride is like putting poison into your own glass of water.
Great knowledge can come from anyone. But if you simply shut someone off because they do not have a PhD or they are not a CEO, you are potentially robbing yourself of a golden nugget. You never know what kind of experience a person has or who the person may be connected with. You cannot go alone. It can be hard to learn from books. And the internet makes it difficult to separate truth from fiction but be opened to learn new things if you want to be successful.
9. You are perfectionist
Perfectionism is crippling. You forget that in the real world failure is not good or bad, it is simply a necessary feedback. Instead of learning from the valuable feedback that failure provides, you try to avoid it entirely. When you make a mistake, you cover it up and hope no one notices. If you do any of these, it is time to make a u-turn else you may never see real success.
10. Giving too much respect
Even Einstein made mistakes. Just because someone is in a prominent position, it does not mean they have all the answers. This habit cripples many people who listen to ‘respectable’ figures who are in a completely different field to them. How many times have you seen a celeb endorsing a product they know nothing about and people listening just because they are famous? Terrible habit…
11. You are content with who and where you are
There is a dark side to being satisfied with your work and accomplishments. Being content and comfortable is the enemy of improvement. Take time during your journey to stop and smell the roses, but do not let be left standing there when the roses are long gone. Keep setting the bar higher. Knock down a goal, celebrate it, and move on.
12. You are addicted to drama
The people you spend time with are known for arguing with each other, flirting with each other’s spouses, lying and generally just causing problems between each other regularly. Your life is a lot like an episode from a soap or reality TV show. You are rarely on good terms with all of the people around you. You gossip about others often, and to your surprise, they gossip about you too. Instead of disassociating yourself from them, you jump right in and add fuel to the fire. Heck, maybe you’re even the star of the show. If your life is such a drama, it may be taking you away from success. This is the time to crack things and jump out of the drama.
What would you add to the list? Drop it in the comment box
About the author
Amare is an entrepreneur and music business consultant. You can follow him @AmareAF for his tweets on industry tips and Life’s Hacks